Where do you find yourself today? Is your sink full of dirty dishes. Is your soul full of restlessness. Do you long for a vacation, a weekend getaway, or just a quiet morning?

Do you find yourself wrestling with the large and the insurmountable?

^1-2 God, the one and only—
    I’ll wait as long as he says.
Everything I need comes from him,
    so why not?
He’s solid rock under my feet,
    breathing room for my soul…

This weekend I found myself at  Women’s Retreat for my church. During the afternoon several of us went for a walk in the manicured gardens at the retreat center. It was a beautiful combination of ponds, little bridges, daffodils, and winding paths leading out to an abandoned railroad trellis and a nature hike. It was a lovely walk and what made it significant was when one of the ladies in my group said “This is what heaven will be like” because as we circled the trails we ran into intergenerational women walking in pairs of two or threes. We could wave and smile and connect in the simple gesture of “I love Jesus, you do too! hello!” instead of the normal routine of trying to align schedules and not knowing how to approach each other, or feeling the pressure of “Not being a good friend” what if we simply strolled through a garden and rested in the simple love of Christ that is foundational to us all. Yet I know this isn’t going to happen right now. Or tomorrow. But someday, someday.

I’ll wait as long as he says. Because he’s the only solid thing under my feet.

Sometimes I’m really tired of waiting. I’m tired of breaking down into tears at inconvenient times. I’m thankful for the graciousness of a lady in my small group at camp who sat with me and offered rational statements amidst the seemingly random storm of emotions. She reminded me that grief causes our linear paths to scatter. How many of you are facing events that cause your linear path of life to twist? Forcing you to bend and change in ways you never wanted to.

Where do you find rest?

Coffee. A comfy bed. Cozy scarves. A sunny vacation spot where you feel like you can conquer whatever life throws at you.

At the retreat we explored this thought: What happens afterwards? Do these things really satisfy your soul? WHY do we never truly find the rest we long for?

Because we can never truly find rest here on this earth. Jessica, our speaker, encouraged us to find freedom in that thought. We don’t need to beat ourselves up when all of the scheduling, bubble baths, and calligraphing Bible verses still leave us with an ache in our hearts for reconciliation.

How can God offer “breathing room” for the soul? How often do we leave our souls parched and forgotten?

This weekend I was able to help with worship by playing the piano. I have not played on a worship team for three years. My fingers were rusty and clumsy and my eyes not attuned to measures and chords. But my soul was on familiar ground. Music can transcend our own thoughts and emotions and that can help place a salve on my thirsty soul. I was enraptured by the hum of the piano strings long after a note is played as I held my foot on the pedal. So often the events of our life echo out into the future. Just as a rock thrown into the middle of a pond causes ripples, and a note hums beyond the instrumentalist’s movement.

As I sat at the piano bench a flock of geese gracefully landed on the surface of the pond. A stream of water shot up to surround the tips of their wings. And I thought, what if we approached our own souls with the same amount of grace? What if we softly landed in truth that we are loved and created by God apart from anything else we do.

What if we let our souls breathe. Instead of yelling at them to be quiet.

 

 

Katrina